A personal post: Fear

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As social workers, we feel the need to be strong for others. We can take in so many emotions from our clients that sometimes we neglect our own. I am not sure if you feel the same way I do. There is this unconscious fear within me that creeps in and out daily. I specifically fear failure. The last thing I want to think about is failing my clients, my family, failing you, and I don’t want to fail myself either. If you are feeling this way today, you are not alone.

Fear is a human thing. A healthy amount of fear keeps us in check with reality and our responsibilities; it also plays a part in guiding us to do the right things and keeps us motivated. So, fear, among other emotions, and how we experience it, make us human. It is also human for us to decide on how much we let our fear dictate our day. The good news is, we can choose to be in the moment with fear. For me, it has been a stressful week. As someone who comes in and out of depression, I knew it was coming to get me at the time I need to hang in there and finish my works. I fear my depression.There were some moments I wanted to give it all up, but I told myself those were moments and moments would pass.

My own way of coping for this week was to spend an hour watching emotional youtube songs and cried my heart out. Whatever stuffed up emotions I had for the week were out. It felt liberating. Oh man, how I needed that cry.

So, if you are facing anxiety, fear, painful emotion, acknowledge them, as we do on our exam–acknowledge our client’s feelings. In the midst of studying and doing life, how are you planning to take care of yourself this week?

8 COMMENTS

  1. Chinh Thank you so much for what you have shared. I know how you feel. I have a tendency to feel fearful related to what I am able to do. You see I have multiple sclerosis and was just treated for breast cancer. I have worked for so many years putting One foot in front of the other for so long I have learned that sometimes denial works wonders. If I focused on any of that too much I would just give up and would be useless related to what I can accomplish Studying for the exam has been a major challenge at best. Some days I think about what it would feel like to just be lazy and relax. But I don’t have much time to do that. I always had to work harder than everyone else in college to get the grades that I achieved which were great. I have the fear that I will not be able to pass just like I have always have. And I have such high expectations on myself that it is brutal. But this time I am older and worn from the problems of the past year. I so greatly appreciate all that you have done to help us all with taking the exam. I sometimes find it helpful to talk to a classmate of mine from undergrad. She knows me well. I am the type of person who wants to get things done now and she is someone who feel comfort in procrastination. We did a research paper together and I know I drove her nuts pushing. She found it funny when I told her that my son is a procrastinator like her and I just don’t get how he can do that. I know what bouts of depression can be like. Be sure to nurture yourself and recognize that you have accomplished so much.

  2. Chinh, I’m not sure if you realize how much of an inspiration you are to me and others, but I just want to thank you so much for help and support through this exam process and your honesty! It means so much!

  3. Hi Chinh, this article really helped me today as I feeling overwhelmed with anxiety and fear. Thank you for sharing this thought induced article to help us realize that the emotions we are experiencing are normal and help us to push through and succeed in the end.

    Thank you,
    Bernadette McCarter

  4. THANKS FOR SHARING. I FEEL THE SAME WAY DAILY. I ALMOST GAVE UP ON TAKING THE TEST AGAIN BECAUSE I WAS OVERWHELMED WITH ALL OF THE MATERIAL THAT I NEED TO STUDY AND I FEAR I WON’T PASS THE TEST. HOWEVER, I THINK I NEED TO PUSH MYSELF MORE AND MORE IN ORDER TO OVERCOME MY FEAR.

  5. I am not someone who replies to things like this but I am this time and I don’t know why. I have being suffering from depression for over 6 months now and I am doubting my ability in everything including giving to my clients. I have test anxiety and this will be the 3rd time that I am taking this test. I NEED to pass this exam for my future but don’t know how to do so. Thank you for sharing your struggles as it has helped me knowing that I am not alone.

  6. I thank you so much for sharing your story and how it makes us aware to help ourselves and others by acknowledging feelings… you’re an amazing person

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